House on Haunted Hill

 

                            In the double feature of past movies I remember seeing at times, the remake to House on Haunted Hill appeared on TUBI, though granted I've only seen previews of it on cable network when on demand movies were a thing back in the nineties, but I will at least say that I have a great memory in terms of movie posters I remember seeing growing up and the remake to House on Haunted Hill was one of those posters I remember. I'll give you a quick recap on the original House on Haunted Hill, basically one of those films Vincent Price did in 1959 where he was always known for as the eerie creepy guy that always had the evil laugh as if he was the devil himself, which in all honesty he was. For which lead us to this remake where I can honestly say they used all the storylines from the original movie but upgraded with a tone of freaky Marylin Manson s**t. For which I honesty have no clue if that is a good thing or a bad thing but all I can say is that having watched this film now, I can purposely say that this was one of those remakes you should never ever try to do if you’re a movie director.

                           A millionaire with theatrical tendencies Stephan Price (Geoffrey Rush), invites several people to stay in a vast creepy building that used to be an insane asylum. Accompanied by his bitter wife Evelyn (Famke Janssen), offers a million dollars to anyone who can stay the whole night without leaving out of fear. When Stephan and Evelyn become trapped with their guests, they quickly realize that the house really is haunted -- and the spirits dwelling within are very angry.

                          The original movie of House on Haunted Hill if some of you haven't seen or haven't checked out my review, the film was, as I would describe it as bit of a camp fill horror furthermore like a B-Movie type of scary where you can predict where the scariness will come. Also, its Vincent Price trying to sound terrifying throughout the film which is when you get to a certain age you realize that it's not that scary. This movie it feels like they really wanted to push the horror up to a hundred percent, by adding a lot of freaky Marylin Manson shit though in fairness he had nothing to do with it other than rewriting one of the cover songs but all the scenes including the opening feels like a Marylin Manson or Godsmack video. Even the director himself, William Malone says that he's a huge fan of the original movie but in all fairness I honestly don't quite understand what he was trying to go with in terms of either making this film really scary or keeping the camp as tribute from the original movie and in all honesty if that's what he's really trying to do then he really didn't do anything interesting, because in all honesty if I wanted to watch a remake of this with the same premise and same concept only making it more scary, then I'd rather watch the original movie. Alike the original you can defiantly point out whose playing who in the remake, like Geoffrey Rush is obviously playing the Vincent Price part, and doesn't really do anything new furthermore believe he was just cashing in for a paycheck which is fine because the man worked from the early seventies. Also, Famke Janssen is defiantly playing Rush's wife who strangely do a great job playing a toxic married couple who I would never want to be around so, if there's any complement, I can give for this movie it's both those two playing the worst people ever. Chris Kattan plays the guy who doesn't want to be in the house aka Elisha Cook Jr. part, and Peter Gallagher aka Eyebrow Man plays the man who’s helping Janssen's character murder Rush though fails miserably so, deep down if you watch this all the way through you can point out whose playing who and how it's going to play out. That is if you've seen the original film and if not then you'll be, okay? Either way I can describe you all the wrongs of how not to do when remaking a movie and this movie is a great example of what not to do, moreover if I had a choice to watch either Jason X or the remake to House on Haunted Hill I'd rather just watch Jason X mainly because it's unintentionally funny and this is way too much of a mess that I wouldn't want to re-watch this film ever again. I'd give this movie credit for trying but, in all honesty, I don't believe the filmmakers and writers wherever trying to make this film better. So, if you’re having thought on wanting to give this movie a chance I would step away from this movie and just watch the original movie. The fact that this movie still exists and is on streaming services is somewhat fascinating and I have to say remember seeing previews to this movie and then finally watching it I'm glad I decided not to watching back in 1999.